Boundaries

So I’ve come to realise that I tend to be inspired to write a blog entry when I’ve noticed a re-occurring theme in my clinic during a week or even month. It makes me think that is this is something our society is dealing with at this time. Or perhaps it's about my own learning. Or all of the above :)

This month’s theme is boundaries. It opens from the Heart Chakra. Loving, trusting and respecting ourself and others.

What is a boundary and how do know where they lie? Boundaries can mean so many different things for different people. Often it is perceived as selfish and closed off. But to me, it is the opposite (remember Heart Chakra). Here is how I interpret this word;

A boundary is knowing when you’ve given enough of yourself to a person or situation and still feel comfortable about this. It is not necessarily your limit, often we can give more, but the repercussions of this additional giving is that we are left feeling resentful or unappreciated.

It is about cherishing yourself and maintaining your energy so you can be of true service to those you love. 

When we have clear boundaries we can say no and not feel guilty or shameful.

If you are not clear on where your boundaries lie you can find yourself Burnt Out. Exhausted. Resentful. A deep feeling of discomfort about a situation may arise.

You say YES to something because you feel obliged. You think it's the right thing to do. Deep down, you know it's not right for you.

So it seems pretty clear to me that it pays to take some time to work out what you are able to give and where your boundaries are. 

Here are some tools to help this drop in;

1. Consider where your limits are being pushed at the moment or have been in the past.
   This involves looking at your life and considering the aspects that are causing feelings of discomfort or resentment. This could be relationships, work situations, family life or really anything at all. FEEL your way. Try not to think too much. What is making you FEEL uncomfortable or unsupported. You have most likely not upheld your boundaries in these situations. 
    
2. Once you have identified an aspect of your life that need attention, ask yourself WHY did I end up here. Is this based on a belief, is it based on guilt, is it based on childhood patterns? Eg. Have I always been required to be the caregiver since childhood? Do I feel guilty if I ask my husband to help out at home if he has worked all day? Do I believe I must do it all? Do I believe only I can do this correctly?
    
3. Start to question this. How else could I approach this? Is this belief true? Do I want to change this? If this is a pattern that has been running for a long time and if so why?
   You might need some help with this step. Talk it out with your partner, friend, counsellor etc. Write about it. Mediate on it. Breathe. Really spend some time here working out why it’s happened.
    
4. How can you approach this situation from a different angle? Ask yourself what would have to change so I could feel comfortable and supported in this situation. Be clear and concise. 
    
5. Give yourself permission to put this into action. Know it is OK (in fact, imperative) to have boundaries and be honouring yourself. Long term, this will actually help you to serve people on a deeper and more sustainable level. 
    
6. Communicate. Express yourself. Clearly and openly. Be prepared for conflict and perhaps even surprise. The other person may have thought this was totally OK (you have probably even told them it is). The clearer you are on the reason why you are feeling crappy and how you want to change the situation, the easier this will be. It is not about blame or shame. It is about you being clear on what needs to change and why.
   How to word this; “I feel like x and I need y to change which will enable me to feel z” It is not “You are doing this and it is crap and I hate everything about you” (don’t laugh you have probably said this before!)
    
7. Stick to it. Follow Through. Commit to yourself. Remind yourself constantly of the WHY. Know you are worth this change. This might just be the hardest part.
    
8. Connect and assess how you FEEL about the situation once these changes have been applied. This is the pat on the back moment.

This is a constant journey. You will need to keep reminding yourself. Ask for help if you need it. Write about it. Express yourself. Believe in yourself. Love yourself. 

Self Love

Ok so I’m seeing a pattern emerging in my clinic at the moment. Self Love. With Capitals. 

I feel that’s all I need to say. But I will elaborate…

Self Love. Self Worth. Self Appreciation. Being OK with You (right now).

Different from ego stroking (note the lack of Capitals).

So many of us believe that giving ourself a kind word when we achieve something great (ie. getting through the day in one piece) is self centred and egotistical. Why? We would most likely say it to someone else. Why not say it to ourselves?

Why do we feel the need to be our own worst enemy in so many situations?

I believe there is some guilt tied up in this, perhaps from generations of self depreciation inflicted from different belief systems, particularly religious organisations. Is this a way to control the masses? Keep us believing we are weak and powerless? So perhaps there is Power aspect to this. 

Also there is the whole marketing phenomena; if we believe we are worthless, we will always be looking for the next best thing to give us some worth (think bigger car, TV, slimming product etc etc) So there is a money making element to this. 

Wow, imagine if we would transcend all this manipulation and truly believe we are great spiritual creatures. Would we buy those extra super control pantyhose?

So my motto is;

I love you Rachelle, just the way you are.

Try saying it to yourself in the mirror (I can feel you squirming from here!) 

Try saying it as you’re reaching into the cupboard for that sugary snack. 

Try saying it before buying that new fan-dangled kitchen appliance. 

Remember to insert your own name in there (whoops!)

And then see if you really do NEED, or if you are simply filling a gap inside you. A disconnect from your Soul. 

Stick with it and see what comes up for you. 

Rachelle

xx

The scales vs. You

Have you ever waged war against your bathroom scales? I know that I have and I seem to always come out the loser. I don't know if it's a female thing; but then again I've seen men as obsessed with the dreaded digits, or if it's a dancer thing; but I've seen many a non-dancer become entangled in the battle or if it's just a human nature thing; I've never seen a cat worry about her weight (but I guess I'll never truly know!)

So why do we do it to ourselves? I truly believe that when I'm out of the battle zone, I have a happy and healthier relationship with myself and food. It's when for reason or another (for me it was when I went to give blood and they weigh you to check BMI) you hop on the scales and BAM alarm bells sound. My weight might not even change, but still there is this voice in my head screaming something unhelpful. 

And then there's the self worth tied up with the a certain target weight "Oh I'm happy now as I've reached x KG's" or "I hate myself as I put on 2kg's"

Just self talk that is completely giving away our personal power to some number that really doesn't mean much.

OK OK, so I hear you saying, what about obese people needing that feedback as encouragement to lose weight for their overall improvement of health? Yes, I agree that obesity is something our society needs to address big time, but I would prefer to see it as 'lifestyle improvement' rather than 'weight loss'.

It's much more sustainable to learn how to connect to HOW your body FEELS after eating fresh and nutritious foods as opposed to junk or processed foods. And how it feels after exercise. And how it feels after good sleep, meditation or rest. This is a skill we seem to have lost in our fast paced society. How can we learn to re-connect to ourselves and our bodies and listen to the wisdom we have to offer ourselves.

This notion of re-connection seems much more beneficial than than relying on some silly apparatus, that in general, leaves us feeling deflated (or inflated) and drains our self worth.

Listen to your body, it knows when to eat, when to sleep and when to exercise. It's just a process of connecting, listening and trusting. Then the magic happens. It can take time and perseverance, but then so do all the good things in life.

Have you ever felt like the days are rushing past you?

I know I have. 

this is such a big issue in our modern life. 95% of all my clients list being overwhelmed, stressed or exhausted on their list of issues to address in their kinesiology session.  

We are constantly trying to fit more and more into each day. And we expect that of each other too. Just last night I called my insurance company (at 10pm at night) and got their answering machine. How frustrated I was! Why are they not available when I have time? Then I stopped and thought, actually no, it is unreasonable to expect someone to be available to answer my call late in the evening. But more and more we are offered 24/7 services- and then when they are not available it frustrates us. And need I bring up the The Smartphone? WOW. Hasn't that changed our work hours.  

So when you feel like it's all too much and you don't know where the week/month/ year has gone, here are some tips to stay present and make the most of your life. 

1. BREATHE. Dare I say it, but just taking a few deep breaths can change your whole outlook on life. To go the extra mile with this try some specific breathing techniques to calm the mind (meditation). More info to come on this...

2. SAVOUR your FOOD. How often have you scoffed your lunch while working and not even realised you ate! Take time to chew your food and taste it. This will also help your digestive system juice out all those lovely nutrients from your food and ease bloating. 

3. Make time for GENTLE EXERCISE. A walk around the block is good for the soul. Fresh air can do wonders for your mind. Stop and smell a flower. Pat the cat on the fence. Talk to a tree. Really, this is life.

4. Turn off your Technology. Many of us use the TV as background noise. But this chatter actually prevents our mind from calming down. If  you don't like silence, try some relaxing music in the background instead. Try uplifting music in the morning to get you going. Always turn off your laptop/ smartphone emails at least one hour before bed to ensure a restful sleep.

5. SMILE and LAUGH. Tell a joke. Listen to a joke and laugh out loud. Get those happy endorphin's flowing around your bloodstream. Surround yourself with positive people. It will make a difference. 

HAPPY LIVING FRIENDS

Rachelle

xx

Change of Season and Your Immune System

I love a good transition, especially when it concerns the weather. I don't know what it is, but the time of changing seasons just suits me to a tee. I love Autumn and Spring. However, these seasons do tend to bring up colds and flu's in more abundance than one would prefer. Which brings me to the immune system... What an amazing system this is. I recently undertook some further study on the immune system and how best to use Kinesiology to balance and strengthen this amazing protector and healer of the body. I am in absolute awe of the intricacies and the power of the immune system. However due to the complexity of the system, there are many ways in which is can become unbalanced. Today I will focus on the most common affliction of our Immune System that we become aware of, that is, when it becomes under energised and not fighting pathogens (bugs) as easily or as quickly as we would like. 

Here are some factors which may cause this to occur within your immune system and some tips to help combat them; 

Unresolved Stress. Yes I know you've heard it before but long term stress has such a negative impact on your body in so many ways. Prolonged stress causes the hormone Cortisol to be released in greater quantities than normal which will quickly shut down your immune system and cause lingering or repetitive colds and flu. So to strengthen your immunity consider reducing the stress in your life. HOW you ask?? Well Kinesiology is great at resolving stress. As is meditation, yoga, taking time out to breathe and relax... see my previous blog on Being in the Moment.

Toxicity in the body. Environmental toxins such as heavy metals, electro-magnetic stress, poor diet, pollution, un-filtered water, medication and alcohol etc can cause your immune system to go out of balance. The body becomes confused about what is good and bad and may start to fight your own tissues rather than the pathogens. This can cause auto-immune conditions and too much inflammation in the body. It can also weaken your immune cells. To help this, consider a good detox program (we can use muscle testing to work out what is the best way to do this for your body) and reducing your exposure the above mentioned items. Live clean.

Poor nutrition will certainly affect your immune system. If your body is not absorbing certain nutrients or they are deficient in your diet then your immune system will become compromised. Key nutrients for the immune system are; Vitamin C (broccoli, kiwi fruit, parsley, berries, citrus fruits), Zinc (Red Meat, Legumes), Antioxidants (Vit C rich foods, Vit E rich foods, Yellow and Orange Fruits and Veges and most of the "Super Foods"). There are also many herbs that can be used to strengthen the white blood cells, these include Astragalus, Olive Leaf and Shiitake Mushrooms. 

Cellular and Genetic Tendencies. We each have a specific constitution that is passed to us through our DNA and cells. If there is unresolved stress that is passed to us from our ancestors via our DNA, then that stress will tend to affect us at some point in our lives also. By using Kinesiology to balance the energetic state of your cells and DNA you can make some drastic changes to your immune system and overall health.  Resolving family traumas/ relationships can also be very powerful in changing the energy of your body also.

So in summary;

Reduce Stress

Eat well

Live clean

Resolve past traumas and negative relationships

Enjoy the last month of this transition season!

Rachelle

xx

Is Cortisol Your Drug of Choice??

We are all faced with the demands of the modern world; technology overload, long working hours, high impact exercise programs, high stress media and election campaigns being just a few. This high stress lifestyle triggers our natural fight/flight survival response; which in turns releases the hormone Epinephrine (also known as adrenalin) into our bodies.When adrenalin is released for long periods of time, the adrenal glands become exhausted and the Cortisol hormone is released into our bloodstream instead. 

Cortisol increases our awareness, gives us a sharp focus, keeps us alert and gives us 'ready to pounce' feeling. It's designed to help us survive life or death situations. And I believe, it is easy to become addicted to. How often do you catch yourself saying, 'oh I'm just too busy' or 'this week I worked for 60 hours' as a badge of honour or means of justification. Many of us also enjoy this alert, on edge feeling. 

However, long term elevated Cortisol levels are not ideal. Cortisol has many varied effects on our bodies, from altering our immune function, weight gain, slowing our metabolism, sleep disturbances and pain in the body. 

Here are some signs that you may be in long term Cortisol overload;

1. Regular backache, muscular pains and headaches: when the adrenal glands become depleted (which occurs in long term stress states) our body produces more Prolactin which makes us more sensitive to pain. Even the slightest twinge can set our pain alarm bells ringing in our brain. 

2. Disturbed sleeping patterns; Cortisol levels are supposed to lower in the evening, allowing Melatonin (the sleep hormone) to kick in and help us drift peacefully off to sleep. When we have too much Cortisol we will often toss and turn and wake up feeling just as exhausted (if not more!) than when we went to bed the night before.

3. Gaining Weight (especially around the tummy and hips) even when eating well and exercising regularly

4. Repetitive colds and flus; Cortisol lowers our immune function

5. Sugar cravings; Cortisol raises our blood sugar levels which then bumps up your insulin levels which drops the blood sugar levels in the body which in turn sets off sugar bells ringing to try and raise it back up again. Oh the vicious cycle of it all!!

6. Low/ Null and Void Sex Drive; cortisol shuts down our natural sex hormones leaving us very hard to impress

7. Gut discomfort; bloating, gas, reflux... all stemming from our poor gut being shut down by Cortisol

8. Feelings of anxiety; Cortisol and epinephrine leave us feeling on edge and jittery.... no it's not just that 4th coffee of the day

9. Feelings of sadness 

So if you tick a few of those boxes here are some tips to help reduce the levels of Cortisol flying around your bloodstream;

1. Restorative rather than high impact exercise. Try yoga, an easy walk, Tai Chi, or if you must run, an easy jog rather than pushing yourself to your limit.

2. Get Creative. Try painting, dancing around the living room (my personal favourite), drawing, writing, gardening- anything that lets your mind wander and dream a little

3. Consider taking some supplements or changing your diet to include more;

•     Probiotic rich foods (think natural yogurt, keffir, fermented foods, miso etc)
•     Antioxidant rich foods (think berries, fruits, leafy greens, fresh herbs)
•     Try and eat more plant based foods which are easy to digest (I prefer to eat cooked veges over raw as they are easier to digest)

4. Meditate, breathe more, dream a little (or a lot)

5. Get out into nature (away from traffic jams, mobile phones, wi-fi and commercial news programs)

6. Love someone or something deeply and with your whole being

I hope this helps you to break free of the Cortisol addiction pattern.

Rachelle

xx

Are you self sabotaging your weight loss journey?

Can Kinesiology help to break the cycle?

Through specialised muscle testing, a Kinesiologist can identify stressed areas of your brain, hormonal system, emotional body and/ or digestive organs that are blocking your ability to lose those extra kg’s. Grehlin is a hormone that helps you to feel satisfied and lets you know when to stop eating, Cortisol is a natural stress hormone that tends to build fat around your tummy, the hypothalamus is an area of the brain that plays a pivotal role in knowing when you need to eat and when you need to rest and digest. If you feel that these signals are getting mixed up in your mind/body connection, then Kinesiology could be the key in your weight loss program. If you feel that you have beliefs around food that holding you back such as “I don’t like to waste my food- I need to everything that is in front of me” or emotional eating habits that aim to fill a void in your spirit, kinesiology can identify these self sabotage programs and help to resolve the belief/ emotion so you are no longer trapped by past beliefs or unresolved emotions. You may feel lighter emotionally and then proceed to become lighter physically.